| The last few days have been beautiful fall weather, and I can't help but wonder – do you ever miss having your Ferrari convertible? |
| Although some days are perfect convertible weather, given I barely drove it the last few years I owned it, averaging less than 50 miles a year, I can honestly say, "No." In fact, I cannot even remember the last time I drove it. |
| I can't help you with that, but I'll never forget the last day we taught at KIPP Houston High School, and you drove it there. You should've seen the student's faces as you were lowering the top on it. |
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Black
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| Funny thing is I never took the car to KIPP because I did not want anyone to think I was showing off, but I forgot how exciting it is for motorheads to see special cars – whether new or vintage. |
|
I doubt everyone crowding around your car was a motorhead, but they certainly
were excited to see your car. Boys AND girls! At the risk of sounding warm and fuzzy, I
think the fact you not only drove a Ferrari, but also raced them, gave the girls a feeling of
empowerment, that they really can do anything. |
| I guess because I always worked in male-dominated industries, I got used to being the "token" woman. Regardless, I never look at things as being gender-specific. |
| That's because you never look at anything like the rest of the world does, or at least most people do. A perfect example of that is you giving Juan a ride in the Ferrari. I doubt many people would have done that. |
| It seemed only fair since he tried to make a "deal" with me the day before – a hand of poker or even a flip of a coin. If he wins, he gets a ride in the Ferrari. If I win, he will be my slave for a day. Giving him a ride in the car was a reward for having the chutzpah to try to make a deal with me. And, in the two years we taught at KIPP, of the over 200 students who took our Personal Finance & Life 101 class, he was the only one ever to do that. |
| I'll never forget how you also told them that although it may not be the proper definition for the Yiddish word "chutzpah," the real-life definition is "having balls." |
| How else would you explain it? |
| You should know as many people have used that word to describe you. And it was consistent with the lesson we taught them about how you "confronted" Bob Weinstein (of the movie producing Weinstein Brothers) at a conference in New York. (Granted, it was well before the #MeToo scandal.) You realized you had nothing to lose, not to mention you were well-prepared. |
| In most scenarios, if you do not ask for something, you will not receive it. So, what is the risk of asking? Someone may say "no"? The way I see it, you are no worse off than before you asked. So, in reality, there is no downside risk, but there IS upside potential. They may say "yes." |
| True. And I laughed, although I wasn't surprised when everyone else started asking for a ride in the Ferrari! |
| Except Juan did not just ask for a ride. He tried to negotiate a deal. He structured it so that there was an upside for me if he lost the bet, which obviously would be the downside for him. But, what impressed me the most was that he was proactive and took a chance, albeit a long shot, to get something he wanted. |
| And given the smile on his face when you drove off, it obviously paid off. I bet, even though it has been many years, it's something he's never forgotten. |
|
The lesson or the ride
in the Ferrari? |
| Both. And I will go out on a limb and say I bet many of the kids standing around the car when you told Juan to jump in, and then explained why, may also remember not only that day but the importance of the lesson. |
| Then, it was a perfect day for a convertible ride. |
Red
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Every time we meet with Jackie Aguilera, we’re still in awe of her expertise and experience in adult education. She continues to bring creativity and passion to her students, while also raising awareness that literacy is about so much more than reading and writing. September is National Literacy Month, so we’re re-running this post because it’s even more relevant today than when it was first written.
Although we have an update: Jackie’s no longer with the Mayor’s Office of Adult Literacy, but given the high demand for her expertise, we wonder if she’s going to take a position with another entity or share her knowledge as a consultant. Regardless, we know she’ll remain a bright light in the world of adult education.
| I have a confession to make, which I’m sure will make you roll your eyes. |
| Interesting caveat and probably true. |
| Every time we meet with Jackie (Aguilera) from the Mayor’s Office of Adult Literacy and hear what she’s doing in the world of adult education, I feel like I’m back in school and having to take copious notes. |
| I am more than happy to send you “homework assignments” as I come across relevant articles and research. |
| Thanks, but no thanks. I’ll stick to taking notes. But that does explain why you’re so knowledgeable about literacy. |
| But, reading information is very different from being at the forefront of literacy innovation. And, if we had never met Jackie, I never would have realized how literacy is more than the dictionary definition, and encompasses more than just reading and writing. |
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Black assets.rebelmouse.io | But that alone is such a critical part of all of our lives and can make the difference between struggling and success. Although I never stopped to think about any of that before we met Jackie. |
| The funny thing is we first met her because of financial literacy. |
| Yes, and I remember wondering why you decided we should go to a Houston Money Week meeting. And while our book was approved as a financial literacy textbook by the (Texas) State Board of Education, I still didn’t think we were qualified to talk about the topic. |
| But, we did go. And, we met Jackie. |
| That’s something I’ll never forget. I remember I let you do the talking when “newbies” had to introduce themselves, or I’d have talked their ears off. After the meeting, this confident but very approachable woman came striding across the room, extended her hand to me, and introduced herself. At the time, she was Literacy Coordinator at EastSide University. |
| All I remember was her energy, commitment, and passion for financial literacy. Not usually a topic discussed with such enthusiasm. |
| There’s an understatement. And not only did it take me by surprise, but I hate to admit it, it was contagious. Especially once we started working with her. |
| Another confession? |
| Maybe. Looking back, I still shake my head in amazement at the incredibly creative ways she made personal finance, typically such a “boring” topic, come alive. And how she used outside-the-box approaches to making learning relevant. |
| And, fun. I still cannot believe she was able to turn something as basic as one of our bookmarks into an hour-long interactive class – using it to not only get conversation going, but to introduce critical life skills. |
| I can’t believe how she incorporates our animated “teasers” into her literacy presentations. Using them to make a point in a light-hearted and fun way. Even if it points out how I was a poster child for not being “literate” when it comes to an assortment of life topics. |
| I dislike the term “literacy” because it makes people feel like they are “illiterate” when they do not know something. In reality, they may never have been exposed to the information or given an opportunity to learn it. |
| I can tell you first-hand that initially I felt stupid, until you pointed out I was merely sheltered. But that’s given me so much more empathy when I think of other people in the same position I once was. |
| Which is why she had us do an assortment of “ConversationStarters” for various literacy topics that she uses – ranging from where this all started – financial literacy – to digital literacy, health literacy, and even news literacy and environmental literacy. To make the topics accessible in a non-threatening way. |
| All I know is that she made me realize that literacy impacts every aspect of our lives. And it has an amazing ripple effect as it then lets us share our knowledge with our families. |
| You forgot to mention that Jackie made us aware of National Literacy Month, although I am not sure it highlights the full extent of the concept of literacy. But, anything that raises awareness is important. |
| I know it’s changed my life in many ways. And not only in terms of Red & Black, although being able to help her, albeit in a small way, help give people the desire, the confidence, the motivation, to learn is something I’ll always be grateful to Jackie for. |
| Since we are strolling down memory lane, I cannot believe you did not mention how working with Jackie all these years has led to a deep respect for her and the friendship that has developed. |
| So, are you going to confess that you can be warm and fuzzy? |
| Never. I was merely stating facts. |
Red isn’t sure that her extreme fear of driving when there’s a risk of high water qualifies as PTSD (and it all started with Black – scroll down for that story!), but she does understand how debilitating it can be (regardless of what triggers it).
What’s interesting is Black picks on Red for many things (that’s part of the job description of a big sister), but not about this because – getting past the stigma of PTSD is tough enough. It’s why National PTSD Awareness Month is so important – not only for those who have PTSD, but for everyone.
| I love the new The Eyewall newsletter that keeps an eye (pun intended) on tropical activity in the Atlantic Ocean, Caribbean Sea, and Gulf of Mexico. |
| You definitely watch the weather more than I do. But, I know that is because you have an extreme “fear” (or however you want to describe it) of driving in heavy rain and potentially facing road flooding. |
| Borderline terror. Thanks to you. |
| Me? I thought I was the one who taught you what to do when encountering high water. |
| Yes, you did, but only after you got me into the situation in the first place. It had already been raining heavily when we each arrived at that meeting near my house. Afterward, although I preferred to go straight home, you thought it’d be ok for us to keep to the original plan of me following you into Houston. |
| At the time, it didn’t seem that bad, just rain. |
| Says the woman in the Mercedes G-Wagon who sits high above cars and even other SUVs. Anyway, I can still remember it like it was yesterday … the rain’s pounding down, you’re behind me, we’re talking on the phone about the meeting, and suddenly you go from your normal conversational tone to sounding what I imagine an air traffic controller would be like – very measured, very direct, very non-emotional. |
| I needed you to pay attention. I could see that you were about to hit high water, and I knew my instructions would go against your natural instincts. You needed to keep giving the car gas, but ease up on the accelerator and, no matter what, not brake. |
| And gently “steer” around the cars you could see were stalled out in front of me. Then, you told me to keep saying these words out loud ... “keep it going, keep it going, keep it going.” And then you hung up on me. |
| I knew there was nowhere for you to pull over, and you were frightened. But, by giving you a “mantra” to say out loud, I hoped to focus you on the most critical thing you needed to do. I did not have the time to explain that keeping your foot on the gas, even if just a little, kept you moving forward and prevented water from entering the engine through the exhaust (tail) pipe. I could see past the water, and knew you just needed to get through it so you could get to higher ground. |
| I felt like I was driving a bumper car at a carnival, trying to avoid all the other cars. Finally, a few minutes later, although it felt like an eternity, I was able to park on high ground. Where I stayed for hours, waiting for the water to recede so I could get home. Ever since, whenever I’m on the road during storms, I feel like I have a form of PTSD. Although I probably shouldn’t say that because it’s unfair to those, especially veterans, who truly have PTSD. |
| I understand you do not want to seem like you are diminishing the seriousness of PTSD, but you may have a mild form of it. However, I am not qualified to diagnose it. Nor do I know enough about it to speak intelligently. |
| Just the thought of high water is traumatic and causes me extreme stress. It’s an overwhelming feeling of not having control of a situation that could quickly become a life-or-death scenario. I can’t even imagine what soldiers must feel after seeing combat. They have to face battle day after day, month after month. And, often, year after year. And then they come home and often must fight an entirely different battle. |
| Not all people exposed to traumatic events develop PTSD, but they are more susceptible. In addition to combat exposure, events such as physical abuse or assault, sexual violence, mass shootings, natural disasters … it is a long list. |
| Wow, I never thought about it that way. Even more reason that we all need to be more sympathetic. And while I appreciate that we may not know the details of their story or situation, it shouldn’t stop us from trying to be kind and understanding first, rather than immediately judging someone. |
| Technically, I think you mean empathetic. Regardless, we can all learn more about PTSD. And, mental illness. No one should ever have to suffer alone. We should let family and friends know it is ok to not always be ok. And, that we are there if they need us. But, remember to always ask for permission before offering help or advice, and respect their wishes if they decline. |
| For someone whose default is being sarcastic, that was very warm and fuzzy. And calming. Similar to when you got me through that highwater. And now, I know to recognize my fear, do my best to avoid situations that will trigger me, and, if unavoidable, find a mantra and try to stay calm. |
| Oh, and trust your instincts. Your gut told you not to go to Houston with me. |
| Now you tell me! |
Red's two Labradoodles
May is National Pet Month, and it’s a bittersweet time for Red as she lost Moo (her black Labradoodle pictured above) just before the New Year. It’s the first time she’s been without a pet since Woof arrived (see below for original post from 2021, including the third “silly name”), and not a day goes by that she doesn’t miss the companionship and unconditional love. So, she tries to focus on all the wonderful memories, knowing that one day she’ll welcome another pet into her life …
| Well, this month marks 18 years since you changed my life, so I wanted to thank you. Again. For bringing such happiness into the lives of the girls and me, although some heartbreaking sadness, too. But there's nothing like unconditional love. |
| OK, but can you tell me what you are talking about? |
| Do you remember when I moved to Houston after living overseas, and we started going to the Hyatt Hill Country in San Antonio for Memorial Day weekend? You were married to Larry, and his girls were young, and Natasha and Sawyer were even younger. Well, in 2003 you asked me if it was OK if you got us a puppy. |
| You had always talked about getting a dog but wanted to have children first. The timing seemed right, but given your allergies, the options were limited. Until I learned about a new breed, well technically a mixed breed, originally developed in Australia to be hypoallergenic guide dogs. |
| I'll never forget you showing me photos of the most incredibly adorable dogs I'd ever seen. The fact Labradoodles were half standard poodle, which was what I had initially thought we'd get, and half Labrador Retriever was amazing. But only you could find the perfect dog from an article in a business magazine. |
| Fortune magazine. It was written by Andy Serwer back when he was Managing Editor (he now is Editor-in-Chief of Yahoo! Finance), and you never knew the topic – or angle – of his next piece. Sometimes serious, sometimes amusing, but always astute and worth reading. And, I actually saved that article. |
| Of course, you did. All I know is that starting with that day in the hotel, I was in love, first with the idea of the Labradoodle, then with the puppy pictures they sent us, and then with her. In fact, from literally the moment you and I picked her up at the airport and then came home and gently placed her next to an unsuspecting Natasha who was asleep on the sofa, she became the most loved member of the family. |
| If only people were as good at unconditional love as pets. Anyway, not only are pets a source of love and companionship, but studies – and science – have shown there are proven health benefits . |
| Well, I don't need a study to tell me how much, over the last 18 years, having Woof, and then Oink and Moo, has meant to the girls and me. And although I still find it upsetting to think of Woof's early passing in 2007, and Oink having left us this past summer still breaks my heart, I'm so grateful for all the memories and love that's still there. |
| I do not think we ever forget them. I still remember Mom's family dog, Buttons, a beautiful Irish Setter that Grandma Betty and Poppy Louie would sometimes bring to the house so she could run free in the backyard. She was almost as tall as me, but was very gentle, and always affectionate. |
| That's funny because our childhood dog, Yenta, was anything but affectionate. I know poodles have a reputation of being proud, and although I loved her, she wasn't the most lovable dog around. I just wanted her to be cuddly, but she wouldn't have any part of it. Instead, if a dog could put their nose up in the air and walk off with a royal air about them, that was her. |
| I prefer to think of it as being stubborn. And, independent. Both traits of poodles. And, may explain why she and I got along so well. |
| No comment. Except to remind pet owners that this is National Pet Month. So, what better time to show your pet how much you love them than to celebrate with them? |
Staying Real … On Social Media?