Words & Banter

A Historic Backdrop. Literally.

Screenshot taken by Black


Red's Head assets.rebelmouse.io


Are you familiar with the saying … behind every great man is a great woman?


Black's HeadBlack assets.rebelmouse.io


Yes, it generally refers to a woman working behind the scenes. But, in this instance, I am guessing that you are referring to Vice President Harris, who is also President of the Senate, and House Speaker Pelosi sitting at the rostrum while President Biden addressed Congress.


Red's Head assets.rebelmouse.io


Not fair! You stole my punch line. But politics aside, it was so inspiring and amazing. Although I'm sure you have a different perspective.

Black's HeadBlack assets.rebelmouse.io


Actually, I agree. It was a historic occasion. Especially when you realize that these two women are No. 1 and No. 2, respectively, in the line of presidential succession.


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I didn't think of that, which makes it an even more powerful image. As there's no secret of the importance that President Biden places on women being not only involved, but having powerful and meaningful roles, in his administration. It's truly an amazing time for women and, perhaps more importantly, for girls. Wasn't it only last month that we talk about how the Senate Sergeant at Arms office was A Senate Dream Team because for the first time since it was created in 1789, its leadership team is all women?


Black's HeadBlack assets.rebelmouse.io


Says the woman who a month ago did not even know there was a Senate Sergeant at Arms office.


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Fine, but that doesn't change the fact that we're seeing more and more women in government with important leadership roles and high levels of responsibility. But it's more than just impressive positions and titles – they're role models proving "You too can do this."


Black's HeadBlack assets.rebelmouse.io


Even the military, which has had a "less than welcoming" history when it came to women (allowing them to serve during wartime but not peacetime, and questioning whether they were fit for combat), has taken great strides. Last month President Biden nominated two female generals to positions as four-star combatant commanders. And, last week the White House announced he'll nominate a woman as the first female four-star admiral in Coast Guard history.


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I think it's safe to say that would have been unthinkable not that long ago. When it comes to President Biden's campaign pledge to have more women in powerful positions, he really is putting his words into action. And that's not taking into consideration all the other appointments and nominations being made!


Black's HeadBlack assets.rebelmouse.io


Exactly. In fact, they just released his 100-Day Staffing Report, and of approximately 1,500 key agency appointees, 58 percent are women. At the U.S. Department of Labor, a critical agency in terms of the issues facing women in the workforce, almost 70 percent of the appointees are women. The report is barely two pages long, but it is obvious that when it comes to the support and advancement of women, it is an era of "historic and transformative leadership."


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No kidding. And well said!


Black's HeadBlack assets.rebelmouse.io


Actually, they are not exactly my words. I "borrowed" the phrase "historic and transformative leadership" from House Speaker Nancy Pelosi's formal invitation to President Biden to speak to Congress and then applied it specifically to the women of his presidency.


Red's Head assets.rebelmouse.io


Which takes us back to where this conversation started …
From back flap of our book, “What I Learned About Life When My Husband Got Fired!” Photographer unknown.

Long before we had an ABOUT page, readers met Red not only through the back flap of our bestselling book, What I Learned About Life When My Husband Got Fired!, but because her crisis was the book’s title! But a lot has happened since Black turned her crisis into a book — a brand — a business. Including a lot of growing up.

And Red? Still warm and fuzzy. Just a lot less sheltered.

WHAT WE SAID THEN

When we started working on the book, Red couldn’t find a photo of her and the girls, so they posed for one in the fall of 2004. Later, our book editor captured Red this way:

After getting a degree in Theater Arts, Red moved back in with her parents until she married an outgoing Englishman and followed his career around the globe. Now she lives in Sugar Land, a suburban city on the outskirts of Houston, Texas. Red is a warm and fuzzy mom whose life revolves around her two red-headed girls. With Red, it's all about the feelings.

WHAT WE DIDN’T KNOW THEN …

We knew Red was used to letting others take the lead. We didn’t know that once she took control, she’d discover how much she was capable of.

We knew her life revolved around her two red-headed girls. We didn’t know how much growing up was still ahead — for them and for Red.

We knew Red had learned a lot when her husband got fired. We probably should have known she’d want to use what she learned to help others.

And we described Red as “warm and fuzzy” and “all about the feelings. ”Still true. She’s just learned that sometimes warm and fuzzy isn’t enough.

AND THERE’S A STORY BEHIND THE PHOTO …

What makes this seemingly ordinary photo remarkable? Red’s in front of the camera!

She was almost always the one behind the camera, so when we needed a photo of her for the book, it had to be staged. In fact, she’s not even sure who took the photo.

At the time, it was simply a photo we needed. Looking at it now, it’s more than that. It captured Red in the middle of the life she’d always dreamed about — and when her girls were still young and being their mom was the center of her world.

She knew they would grow up. She just didn’t know how quickly that picture would become a memory.

A lot has changed since that photo was taken. Including Red.

Same family. Very different approaches to life.

Red is warm and fuzzy. Black is pragmatic and sarcastic.

  • Red leads with her heart. Black leads with her head.
  • Red wants to talk it through. Black wants to solve it.
  • Red gives you the context. Black gives you the bottom line.

Which sounds more like you?

Which brings us to one of our favorite examples: When we had to explain the differences between us for the Introduction to What I Learned About Life When My Husband Got Fired!, Red wrote pages with her usual blah-blah-blah. Black gave the book designer a Microsoft Excel spreadsheet.

Funny thing is that over the years, readers have not only told us which of us they’re more like, but also gone so far as to identify the “Reds” and “Blacks” in their own families. We even had a few who nicknamed themselves (one was “Brown,” another was “Bald”).

So, are you more like Red or Black? Or somewhere in between?


Red's Head Red assets.rebelmouse.io


I know everyone’s always trying to find balance in their life. I thought becoming an empty nester would make that easier, but apparently not. The girls may be grown, but being a mom doesn’t end when your children move out. Between them, Red & Black, and my seemingly endless lists of things to do, I still struggle.


Black's Head Black assets.rebelmouse.io


And, as I am a die-hard workaholic who admits to not having a life, you think I have the answer?


Red's Head Red assets.rebelmouse.io


Excellent point. Never mind.


Black's Head Black assets.rebelmouse.io


However, I do have some suggestions … although I will preface it with, "Do as I say, not as I do."
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