Memory Lane

Come Hell Or High Water … Or Both?

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I love the new The Eyewall newsletter that keeps an eye (pun intended) on tropical activity in the Atlantic Ocean, Caribbean Sea, and Gulf of Mexico.


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You definitely watch the weather more than I do. But, I know that is because you have an extreme “fear” (or however you want to describe it) of driving in heavy rain and potentially facing road flooding.


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Borderline terror. Thanks to you.


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Me? I thought I was the one who taught you what to do when encountering high water.

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Yes, you did, but only after you got me into the situation in the first place. It had already been raining heavily when we each arrived at that meeting near my house. Afterward, although I preferred to go straight home, you thought it’d be ok for us to keep to the original plan of me following you into Houston.

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At the time, it didn’t seem that bad, just rain.

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Says the woman in the Mercedes G-Wagon who sits high above cars and even other SUVs. Anyway, I can still remember it like it was yesterday … the rain’s pounding down, you’re behind me, we’re talking on the phone about the meeting, and suddenly you go from your normal conversational tone to sounding what I imagine an air traffic controller would be like – very measured, very direct, very non-emotional.

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I needed you to pay attention. I could see that you were about to hit high water, and I knew my instructions would go against your natural instincts. You needed to keep giving the car gas, but ease up on the accelerator and, no matter what, not brake.

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And gently “steer” around the cars you could see were stalled out in front of me. Then, you told me to keep saying these words out loud ... “keep it going, keep it going, keep it going.” And then you hung up on me.

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I knew there was nowhere for you to pull over, and you were frightened. But, by giving you a “mantra” to say out loud, I hoped to focus you on the most critical thing you needed to do. I did not have the time to explain that keeping your foot on the gas, even if just a little, kept you moving forward and prevented water from entering the engine through the exhaust (tail) pipe. I could see past the water, and knew you just needed to get through it so you could get to higher ground.

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I felt like I was driving a bumper car at a carnival, trying to avoid all the other cars. Finally, a few minutes later, although it felt like an eternity, I was able to park on high ground. Where I stayed for hours, waiting for the water to recede so I could get home. Ever since, whenever I’m on the road during storms, I feel like I have a form of PTSD. Although I probably shouldn’t say that because it’s unfair to those, especially veterans, who truly have PTSD.

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I understand you do not want to seem like you are diminishing the seriousness of PTSD, but you may have a mild form of it. However, I am not qualified to diagnose it. Nor do I know enough about it to speak intelligently.

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Just the thought of high water is traumatic and causes me extreme stress. It’s an overwhelming feeling of not having control of a situation that could quickly become a life-or-death scenario. I can’t even imagine what soldiers must feel after seeing combat. They have to face battle day and day, month after month. And, often, year after year. And then they come home and often must fight an entirely different battle.

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Not all people exposed to traumatic events develop PTSD, but they are more susceptible. In addition to combat exposure, events such as physical abuse or assault, sexual violence, mass shootings, natural disasters … it is a long list.


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Wow, I never thought about it that way. Even more reason that we all need to be more sympathetic. And while I appreciate that we may not know the details of their story or situation, it shouldn’t stop us from trying to be kind and understanding first rather than immediately judging someone.


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Technically, I think you mean empathetic. Regardless, we can all learn more about PTSD. And, mental illness. No one should ever have to suffer alone. We should let family and friends know it is ok to not always be ok. And, that we are there if they need us. But, remember to always ask for permission before offering help or advice, and respect their wishes if they decline.


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For someone whose default is being sarcastic, that was very warm and fuzzy. And calming. Similar to when you got me through that high water. And now, I know to recognize my fear, do my best to avoid situations that will trigger me, and, if unavoidable, find a mantra and try to stay calm.


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Oh, and trust your instincts. Your gut told you not to go to Houston with me.


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Now you tell me!
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Although Red isn’t cooking this Thanksgiving and will be reading “The Godfather” instead of watching it on TV, some traditions remain unchanged. Like reminiscing about the perfect, albeit naked, turkey! And rerunning Black’s Thanksgiving post from 2020.

It instantly became a favorite of Red’s and provides the perfect opportunity for her to wish you a very Happy Turkey Day …

Today is Thanksgiving, and I cannot help but wonder why we are online. However, everyone has their own way of celebrating. I know that Red is in the kitchen cooking – and watching a marathon of "The Godfather" movies. Which is perfect as turkeys take such a long time to cook and patience is important when you want it perfectly browned. So inviting, so appetizing, so … naked?

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You may have to wait until the end of the month to celebrate Halloween, but the entire month of October is Bat Appreciation Month. So, Red can’t help but reminisce about when her oldest daughter, Natasha, first fell in love with bats. And Black? She can’t help but think of her first tattoo?!


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Thanks for sending me Natasha's Austin-inspired business plan. But while I know that's her future, I can't help but think about the first time I took her to Austin.


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All I remember is that it was love at first sight.


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It was on our way home from taking Sawyer to camp, and I told her we were making a slight "detour". She was so excited when I pulled up to the hotel as she's always loved hotels. But that night, as we walked onto Congress Avenue Bridge and saw the thousands and thousands of bats fly out into the sunset, she was mesmerized and "in love".
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‘Tis the season for joyous celebrations – of whatever holiday you may celebrate. And fond memories. Even though Red wasn’t born when this happened, it’s still one of her holiday favorites (yes, she initially thought Black must have been on the “naughty list”) and a reminder of what the holidays are truly all about.

BLACK: I do not know at what age my Christmas memories began, but I do remember being very young and in awe of a very large – and very well decorated – Christmas tree in our family room. I even remember peeking down the stairs late one evening and seeing my mother standing extremely close to Santa Claus. OK, you might not find that an unusual memory, except my family is Jewish.

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