RED & BLACK ... A Time For Independence

Design by Sawyer Pennington, Underlying photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash

Black assets.rebelmouse.io	I keep forgetting to ask you, since Sawyer is away at camp, what did you do for July 4th?
Red assets.rebelmouse.io	Well, it was a very different Fourth of July. No kids. No barbeque. No fireworks.
Black assets.rebelmouse.io	I know most of the fireworks were cancelled, but is your barbeque grill broken?
Red assets.rebelmouse.io	No, this year I decided to declare my "independence" from doing a big holiday grocery shop, major prep work, and cooking outdoors in Texas heat.
Black assets.rebelmouse.io	I wish there were more people willing to declare their independence.
Red assets.rebelmouse.io	Somehow I don't think you're talking about me making an easy pasta dish in the comfort of my air-conditioned house vs. standing over a hot barbeque on a hot day.

Black assets.rebelmouse.io	No, but the quote, "If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen" does apply to a bunch of elected government "leaders" – and I use that terms loosely as they actually seem to be "followers." You cannot tell me they do not see how their actions – or inactions – are hurting their constituents.
Red assets.rebelmouse.io	Although I agree with you, I can see where some elected officials feel the need to maintain the party line. Like you've always told me, you have to pick your battles.
Black headassets.rebelmouse.io	Yes, but we are talking about people's lives. You are the history buff, so you well know there was a time when people would give their lives to do what they felt was right – for their families, for their community, for their country. Even if that meant standing up to those in control.
Red assets.rebelmouse.io	Yes, but I think you're being a bit dramatic. Which is interesting as I was the theater major, not you. After all, equating sacrificing your life to taking a stand about your beliefs is different from leaders who aren't willing to "speak up" to "higher-ups".
Black headassets.rebelmouse.io	Really? One is risking their life – the other, maybe, their career. True leadership is about doing what is right. And, if you feel that something that is wrong, take an independent stand. It is about having the strength, courage, and conviction to do what you believe is right.
red headassets.rebelmouse.io	Sounds like you watched "The Patriot" over the holiday weekend.
spiky hairassets.rebelmouse.io	Never heard of it, but you are the movie-goer, not me. Although we both know your primary motivation is the popcorn.
red head assets.rebelmouse.io	True. Anyway, it starred Mel Gibson as an American colonist, and although an "action movie" showing our fight to win independence from Britain, it still explores those exact themes. America may not be a perfect country, but it has always stood up and been willing to fight for what it believes in.
assets.rebelmouse.io	Yes, but that is harder to do when leaders are not leading, but rather just following. Being a true leader requires independent thinking.
red head assets.rebelmouse.io	That reminds me of something someone told me decades ago about a colleague they worked with, "He would be a great leader, if only people would follow him." It definitely made me laugh.
black headassets.rebelmouse.io	Sometimes you do not realize the wisdom of a true leader until much later. Initially, they may be measured by doing what is popular or convenient.
red head assets.rebelmouse.io	I love history, and there are countless examples of just that, but I'm not sure how you begin to crack that nut. Today, thinking, yet alone independent thinking, isn't what a lot of people do well.
black headassets.rebelmouse.io	OK, Miss History. After we got our independence from England, how were we ruled? Who made all the decisions?
red head assets.rebelmouse.io	Is this a trick question?
black headassets.rebelmouse.io	No, I do not know the answer, and I am trying to understand what happened and why.
red head assets.rebelmouse.io	First, my disclaimer that I know more about Tudor history than American history, but to keep it short and simple, the 13 states had to find a way to work together, and the original structure (if you're ever on Jeopardy remember "The Articles of Confederation") gave the states a lot of power. However, that didn't work out so well, and after just a few years, there was the brilliant idea to create The Constitution, which establishes and defines the separation of powers.
black headassets.rebelmouse.io	So, it required a lot of creative thinking, with an end goal of what was best for "We the people". In other words, when our country was born – it was led by independent thinkers not people that merely followed along.
red head assets.rebelmouse.io	Yes, but that's history. Good luck turning back that clock! It would require those "up the ranks" to relinquish some of their power. And need I remind you that we had to fight the War of Independence to achieve that?
black head assets.rebelmouse.io	That history fact, I do know. However, I think we have recently witnessed the importance – and power – of independent thinking. And, combined with good leadership, it can result in great things.
red head assets.rebelmouse.io	Absolutely! And to say there's such an overwhelming need for that at this critical time would be a huge understatement. Maybe it's time for another revolution, although this time make it peaceful.
assets.rebelmouse.io	The War of Independent Thinking. Now that would warrant fireworks.

Want to read other columns? Here's a list.

monthly column

Words & Banter

Quick ... Can You Name 5 January Holidays?

You may think the holiday season’s over, but January’s filled with an assortment of holidays, including some very unusual ones. Luckily, unlike the December holidays, these are much less stressful and can be lots of fun. Especially for us, as they celebrate some of our favorite things. (Of the five holidays listed below, can you guess which are Red’s favorites and which are Black’s?)

red head assets.rebelmouse.io	It’s January, and everyone’s probably tired of reading about New Year’s resolutions.
Black assets.rebelmouse.io	Not me. Since I never make them, I never feel the need to read about them.
red head assets.rebelmouse.io	Of course, you don’t. So, what should we write about?
Black assets.rebelmouse.io	How about that we celebrate some of our favorite things in January?

So many “National Days” in January are fun (we’ve written about them over the years) and remind us of some of our favorite things. (Can you pick which are Red’s favorite holidays and which are Black’s?) And whether or not you make resolutions, it’s always important to have a sense of humor and enjoy the simpler things in life …

NATIONAL CLEAN YOUR DESK DAY: Resolutions Aside … A Clean Desk? Is That Even Possible???
NATIONAL BAGEL DAY: Not A Trick Question ... Who Doesn’t Love Bagels?
NATIONAL POPCORN DAY: Do People Really “Celebrate” Popcorn? Red Does!
NATIONAL HUGGING DAY: Think Before … Hugging?!
NATIONAL BACKWARD DAY: Celebrating Having Fun … And Success … By Being Backward?

Answer: Red’s favorites are Bagels, Popcorn, and Hugging. Black’s are Clean Desk, Bagels, and Backward.

holidays

Words & Banter

Did You Know ... Even Thanksgiving Is … All About The Shoes?

Photo courtesy of Red’s eldest daughter, Natasha

What does Thanksgiving have to do with shoes?! Or, the fact some of Red’s most memorable Thanksgiving celebrations happened when she lived overseas and introduced the holiday to friends, none of whom were American. But this column from 2022 is bittersweet for Black, as shortly after it ran, her good friend John passed away … yet the memories of Thanksgivings spent together – and of dear friends – live on. (But that still doesn’t explain the shoes …)

red head assets.rebelmouse.io

At the risk of asking you a warm and fuzzy question, have you thought about what you’re most thankful for this Thanksgiving?

Black's Head Black assets.rebelmouse.io

Yes.

red head assets.rebelmouse.io

I should’ve guessed that you’d take the question literally. Could you expand on that a little, or at least give me a hint?

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friendship

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Black assets.rebelmouse.io	Friends.
red head assets.rebelmouse.io	I should’ve guessed that too since John’s been in the hospital for the past several weeks and is one of your oldest friends.
Black assets.rebelmouse.io	Not sure “oldest” is the kindest way to define it, but he and his wife have been my closest friends for over 35 years. To the point that John calls me his “second wife,” although he’s only been legally married once.
red head assets.rebelmouse.io	That’s funny, but on my recent fall foliage trip, I realized it was so much more than chasing leaves as I experienced the joy and appreciation of visiting a dear friend and her family. And while phone calls, texting, and even FaceTime are great, it’s just not the same as spending time together.
Black assets.rebelmouse.io	I was going to mention that when you first told me you were going to see Sawyer in Nashville and also spend some time at Amy’s in east Tennessee, but figured you already knew that friendships can easily be taken for granted … until something makes you fully appreciate them.
red head assets.rebelmouse.io	That’s so true. Although I prefer to have a small group of friends, and most of mine I’ve known for decades – either from elementary school, college, or my years living in Hong Kong. Unfortunately, though, none of them now live near me.
Black assets.rebelmouse.io	Friends do not require living in the same town, although that is usually how friendships begin. And, while we may not stay in touch as frequently as we want, over time, we see who our true friends are … they are the ones who are always there for us, during good times and bad. And, in my case, are brave enough to point out when they do not agree with me.
red head assets.rebelmouse.io	Very brave. My friends have it easier, but I count on them to give me an honest perspective no matter what, although I prefer when they agree with me.
Black assets.rebelmouse.io	Of course, you do. And, your friends should be thankful you are so easygoing.
red head assets.rebelmouse.io	Well, at the risk of sounding corny, with Thanksgiving just days away, it’s the perfect time to be truly thankful for our dear friends.
Black assets.rebelmouse.io	It reminds me of the photo that Natasha sent us last year when she was celebrating “ Friendsgiving” with her friends in England.
red head assets.rebelmouse.io	Besides not realizing it was an actual thing and not Natasha combining the words “friends” and “Thanksgiving,” I was expecting photos of her attempt at making sweet potatoes or other traditional Thanksgiving foods , or maybe a bunch of Brits sitting around the table with the lone American. Not a photo of everyone’s shoes in the entry hallway.
Black assets.rebelmouse.io	I never thought of Thanksgiving as being “all about the shoes”, but that image sums up the true meaning of the holiday.
red head assets.rebelmouse.io	Tell the truth; everything’s always all about the shoes for you. But, given this Thanksgiving will be the first without Mom, the image’s a wonderful reminder of the importance of friends who’ve been there for me this year. And I include you as both family and friend.
Black assets.rebelmouse.io	Once is enough for me. And, as the saying goes, you cannot choose your family but (like shoes) you can choose your friends. So, pick carefully, and then appreciate them.