Ask Red & Black

What do you think about hugging?

FULL QUESTION: What do you think about hugging? And how do you handle hugging in the age of COVID?


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Being a warm and fuzzy person, I’ve always been a hugger, but even before the pandemic, I was aware that some people liked hugs more than others, so would “regulate” my hugs accordingly. For example, neither of my children have inherited my hugging “gene”, although sometimes they don’t get a vote, instead getting a big ole’ mom hug. But I digress (as usual).

My biggest adjustment in terms of “COVID” hugging, especially now that things have become a little “easier” (I’ve been vaccinated and had a booster), is that I simply ask people what their preference is. For some, a hug is welcome (and the human touch wanted), while others are good with a fist or elbow bump, while others prefer to keep their distance entirely. Which, to be honest, is usually people that wouldn’t have wanted a hug even before COVID, so not a big deal.


Black assets.rebelmouse.io

Anyone who knows me knows I am a non-hugger. Always have been. I am also that person who is always curious, so found there is science behind why people are or are not huggers. And, although I fully appreciate that hugs provide a wealth of health benefits (I was fascinated by this study), that still does not change that I find hugging can be selfish (the hugger often is the one needing a hug).

COVID, and especially the fact the omicron variant is so contagious, provides a legitimate excuse for me not to hug. However, I will make exceptions for close friends that I know need the hug – as long as I also know that they, like me, are fully vaccinated and still mask-up outside the home.

FULL QUESTION: It’s hotter than ever …do you have any tips for looking “nice” during the heat of the summer?

Summers are hotter than ever, but it’s always been a challenge to look put together (forget polished) in August. Especially in the Houston area, so here's an “Ask Red & Black” summer rerun … because some things never go out of style …



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I'm laughing because I suspect Black would argue that I rarely look "nice" in the sense that I rarely "dress up". Even before the pandemic, unless I had a Red & Black business meeting or speaking engagement, my normal "look" was that of super comfy – workout or very casual clothing and minimal makeup. Here in Texas, where the heat and humidity are oppressive, I'm always looking for tips because the moment you step outside, you're going to start sweating, your makeup will drip, and your hair will either frizz or wilt (neither's a good look for me). So, I keep my skincare simple and summer-friendly – extremely lightweight, tinted facial moisturizer with a high SPF (so I only need a single product) and waterproof mascara.

I've never been very creative when managing my long hair for the summer, but my daughter let me in on a secret when she straightened my hair for me. Unlike my rushed approach, she took an extra 10 minutes to do it in smaller sections, which looked great when my hair was down but, amazingly, even made my ponytail look "finished". Taking a little more time to do it right makes a huge difference as now my hair stands up to the heat and humidity. (Good news is she's always willing to do it for me, bad news is that she goes to college in a few months, so I'll have to learn how to do it myself.)


Black's HeadBlack assets.rebelmouse.io


When I started racing cars in the mid-1990s, I cut my hair very short so I could easily style it with some water and hair goo when I removed my helmet, which makes it perfect for summer. (Plus, I calculated that I could save over 10 hours/month, or five full days a year, by not dealing with my hair.)

In terms of clothing, it is a function of where you are going or where you work (obviously, if you are in the banking industry, you will dress very differently than someone who works for a design or marketing firm). For the last few decades, I have worn the same "uniform" – dark slacks or jeans, white shirt, blazer, and colorful Hermès shawl. In the summer, I select pieces that are light-colored, loose-fitting, and breathable fabrics, but if I had to give one tip, it would be to wear layers since going in and out of air-conditioning can be a challenge, although I see it as a fashion opportunity. In fact, that is how my "signature" shawls started as, regardless of the season, I would always have one with me to handle changes in temperature.

It’s 2024 … you wouldn’t think there’d be so much controversy over Black history, which makes Black History Month even more important. We loved it when the question below was asked of us two years ago, so we’re rerunning it, but found a new article about little-known facts about Black History Month we found very interesting. Let us know what you think …



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I’m a little embarrassed to admit that it was only a few years ago that I learned about February being Black History Month, and that it was founded to shine a light on accomplishments that might otherwise go unnoticed and unappreciated. I’ve always loved history and wish that I had been taught more of this in school as I strongly believe that if we all were exposed to people from different races, ethnicities, religions (comparative religions was one of my favorite college classes), it would go a long to helping us appreciate those differences.

Besides history, I love movies, so I love when the combination teaches us something unexpected. For example, one of my favorite movies, Hidden Figures, tells the stories of three amazing Black women who were mathematicians working at NASA in the 1960s who truly broke boundaries, defied expectations, and gave us a window into their lives.


Black assets.rebelmouse.io


I like to consider myself a lifelong learner and love to research things that pique my interest or intrigue me, so I was fascinated by the history of Black History Month , and its evolution from Negro History Week. The initial week was chosen because it included the birthdays of both Abraham Lincoln (February 12) and the abolitionist Frederick Douglass (February 14), men who were already celebrated by the Black community, and who encouraged all Americans to study the little-known history of Blacks.

As an interesting sidenote, Douglass was also a lifelong supporter of women’s rights and died just hours after attending a meeting with suffragists (including his friend Susan B. Anthony).

FULL QUESTION: Do you have any tips for looking “nice” during the heat of the summer? And for going into fall since it’s still hot?

Well, technically, July may be the hottest month (and this year it was record-setting hot), but given August is still “too darn hot” (we love the musical number), and it will probably run into September, we thought we’d rerun this “Ask Red & Black” …



Red's Head assets.rebelmouse.io


I'm laughing because I suspect Black would argue that I rarely look "nice" in the sense that I rarely "dress up". Even before the pandemic, unless I had a Red & Black business meeting or speaking engagement, my normal "look" was that of super comfy – workout or very casual clothing and minimal makeup. Here in Texas, where the heat and humidity are oppressive, I'm always looking for tips because the moment you step outside, you're going to start sweating, your makeup will drip, and your hair will either frizz or wilt (neither's a good look for me). So, I keep my skincare simple and summer-friendly – extremely lightweight, tinted facial moisturizer with a high SPF (so I only need a single product) and waterproof mascara.

I've never been very creative when managing my long hair for the summer, but my daughter let me in on a secret when she straightened my hair for me. Unlike my rushed approach, she took an extra 10 minutes to do it in smaller sections, which looked great when my hair was down but, amazingly, even made my ponytail look "finished". Taking a little more time to do it right makes a huge difference as now my hair stands up to the heat and humidity. (Good news is she's always willing to do it for me, bad news is that she goes to college in a few months, so I'll have to learn how to do it myself.)


Black's HeadBlack assets.rebelmouse.io


When I started racing cars in the mid-1990s, I cut my hair very short so I could easily style it with some water and hair goo when I removed my helmet, which makes it perfect for summer. (Plus, I calculated that I could save over 10 hours/month, or five full days a year, by not dealing with my hair.)

In terms of clothing, it is a function of where you are going or where you work (obviously, if you are in the banking industry, you will dress very differently than someone who works for a design or marketing firm). For the last few decades, I have worn the same "uniform" – dark slacks or jeans, white shirt, blazer, and colorful Hermès shawl. In the summer, I select pieces that are light-colored, loose-fitting, and breathable fabrics, but if I had to give one tip, it would be to wear layers since going in and out of air-conditioning can be a challenge, although I see it as a fashion opportunity. In fact, that is how my "signature" shawls started as, regardless of the season, I would always have one with me to handle changes in temperature.