| Well, this question immediately brings to mind the
rekindling of "Bennifer"
(nickname given to the celebrity romance of Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez)
since it's been in the news so much. And
it's not only the TV talk shows but also some of the "news" shows. While many people are asking "Why now?" and "Why are so many people happy
about it?" I think it's pretty simple. Many people, especially women, are just romantics at heart, and whether
dramas or romantic comedies, most of us love a good love story. Full stop. And they often follow the same plotline – the couple meet, fall in love,
break up, but in the last scene, realize they've never stopped loving one
another, reconcile, and live happily ever after.
So, especially given what we've all been through with the pandemic, what could be better than a real-life love story with a happy ending? And if celebrities can do it, why can't we? Of course, it doesn't help that many people tend to reminisce about the good times, making it easy to over-romanticize a past relationship, especially if thinking about rekindling it. |
| Without getting into all the studies on Socioemotional Selectivity Theory, the
bottom line is that as people get older, they focus on the time remaining and direct
their attention to positive thoughts and memories. Combine that with the emotional drain of the pandemic
and limited social interaction, and it is easy to understand why people go back
to their Rolodex (pre-technology
contact lists) rather than try to meet new people. Yes, there may be good reasons to go this route. For me, it would make me question the logic of trying again when something did not work in the past. The operative word in that sentence is "question" as I am a firm believer in asking questions, lots of questions. With my favorite one being, "Why?" So, while I cannot tell you why people are trying to rekindle old romances, I can encourage anyone doing so to ask themselves why they are doing it, including why it did not work the first time, and why they believe this time would be different. |
FULL QUESTION: It’s hotter than ever …do you have any tips for looking “nice” during the heat of the summer?
Summers are hotter than ever, but it’s always been a challenge to look put together (forget polished) in August. Especially in the Houston area, so here's an “Ask Red & Black” summer rerun … because some things never go out of style …
|
I'm laughing because I suspect Black would argue that I
rarely look "nice" in the sense that I rarely "dress up". Even before the pandemic, unless I had a Red
& Black business meeting or speaking engagement, my normal "look" was that
of super comfy – workout or very casual clothing and minimal makeup. Here in Texas, where the heat and humidity are
oppressive, I'm always looking for tips because the moment you step outside,
you're going to start sweating, your
makeup will drip, and your hair will either frizz or wilt (neither's
a good look for me). So, I keep my
skincare simple and summer-friendly – extremely lightweight, tinted facial
moisturizer with a high SPF (so I only need a single product) and waterproof
mascara.
I've never been very creative when managing my long hair for the summer, but my daughter let me in on a secret when she straightened my hair for me. Unlike my rushed approach, she took an extra 10 minutes to do it in smaller sections, which looked great when my hair was down but, amazingly, even made my ponytail look "finished". Taking a little more time to do it right makes a huge difference as now my hair stands up to the heat and humidity. (Good news is she's always willing to do it for me, bad news is that she goes to college in a few months, so I'll have to learn how to do it myself.) |
|
When I started racing cars in the mid-1990s, I cut my hair very
short so I could easily style it with some water and hair goo when I removed my
helmet, which makes it perfect for summer. (Plus, I calculated that I could
save over 10 hours/month, or five full days a year, by not dealing with my
hair.)
In terms of clothing, it is a function of where you are going or where you work (obviously, if you are in the banking industry, you will dress very differently than someone who works for a design or marketing firm). For the last few decades, I have worn the same "uniform" – dark slacks or jeans, white shirt, blazer, and colorful Hermès shawl. In the summer, I select pieces that are light-colored, loose-fitting, and breathable fabrics, but if I had to give one tip, it would be to wear layers since going in and out of air-conditioning can be a challenge, although I see it as a fashion opportunity. In fact, that is how my "signature" shawls started as, regardless of the season, I would always have one with me to handle changes in temperature. |
It’s 2024 … you wouldn’t think there’d be so much controversy over Black history, which makes Black History Month even more important. We loved it when the question below was asked of us two years ago, so we’re rerunning it, but found a new article about little-known facts about Black History Month we found very interesting. Let us know what you think …
|
I’m a little embarrassed to admit that it was only a few
years ago that I learned about February being
Black History Month, and that it was founded to
shine a light on
accomplishments
that might otherwise go unnoticed and unappreciated. I’ve always loved history and wish that I had
been taught more of this in school as I strongly believe that if we all were
exposed to people from different races, ethnicities, religions (comparative
religions was one of my favorite college classes), it would go a long to
helping us appreciate those differences.
Besides history, I love movies, so I love when the combination teaches us something unexpected. For example, one of my favorite movies, Hidden Figures, tells the stories of three amazing Black women who were mathematicians working at NASA in the 1960s who truly broke boundaries, defied expectations, and gave us a window into their lives. |
|
I like to consider myself a lifelong learner and love to
research things that pique my interest or intrigue me, so I was fascinated by
the
history of Black History
Month
, and its evolution from Negro History Week. The initial week was chosen because it included the birthdays of both
Abraham Lincoln
(February 12) and the abolitionist Frederick Douglass (February 14), men who were already celebrated by the Black community, and
who encouraged all Americans to study the little-known history of Blacks.
As an interesting sidenote, Douglass was also a lifelong supporter of women’s rights and died just hours after attending a meeting with suffragists (including his friend Susan B. Anthony). |
Red
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Black
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FULL QUESTION: Do you have any tips for looking “nice” during the heat of the summer? And for going into fall since it’s still hot?
Well, technically, July may be the hottest month (and this year it was record-setting hot), but given August is still “too darn hot” (we love the musical number), and it will probably run into September, we thought we’d rerun this “Ask Red & Black” …
|
I'm laughing because I suspect Black would argue that I
rarely look "nice" in the sense that I rarely "dress up". Even before the pandemic, unless I had a Red
& Black business meeting or speaking engagement, my normal "look" was that
of super comfy – workout or very casual clothing and minimal makeup. Here in Texas, where the heat and humidity are
oppressive, I'm always looking for tips because the moment you step outside,
you're going to start sweating, your
makeup will drip, and your hair will either frizz or wilt (neither's
a good look for me). So, I keep my
skincare simple and summer-friendly – extremely lightweight, tinted facial
moisturizer with a high SPF (so I only need a single product) and waterproof
mascara.
I've never been very creative when managing my long hair for the summer, but my daughter let me in on a secret when she straightened my hair for me. Unlike my rushed approach, she took an extra 10 minutes to do it in smaller sections, which looked great when my hair was down but, amazingly, even made my ponytail look "finished". Taking a little more time to do it right makes a huge difference as now my hair stands up to the heat and humidity. (Good news is she's always willing to do it for me, bad news is that she goes to college in a few months, so I'll have to learn how to do it myself.) |
|
When I started racing cars in the mid-1990s, I cut my hair very
short so I could easily style it with some water and hair goo when I removed my
helmet, which makes it perfect for summer. (Plus, I calculated that I could
save over 10 hours/month, or five full days a year, by not dealing with my
hair.)
In terms of clothing, it is a function of where you are going or where you work (obviously, if you are in the banking industry, you will dress very differently than someone who works for a design or marketing firm). For the last few decades, I have worn the same "uniform" – dark slacks or jeans, white shirt, blazer, and colorful Hermès shawl. In the summer, I select pieces that are light-colored, loose-fitting, and breathable fabrics, but if I had to give one tip, it would be to wear layers since going in and out of air-conditioning can be a challenge, although I see it as a fashion opportunity. In fact, that is how my "signature" shawls started as, regardless of the season, I would always have one with me to handle changes in temperature. |