This is one of those posts that was "suggested" I write, although I did not see why anyone would care about my shoes or my shoe dilemma. Yes, I am known for my shoes – in particular, my stiletto heels. In fact, when Red and I taught at KIPP Houston High School, the students would text about my shoes within minutes of me arriving on campus. (Red would always ask them, doing her version of sarcasm, why they did not do the same for her "comfy" shoes and boots.)
When we did a speaking engagement about personal finance at Silsbee High School, my shoes became a topic of discussion during the Q&A session. (Red was so amused that she included it as Story #2 in her Memory Lane post titled "The Road To Silsbee. To Where?!") I will admit I was impressed by how astute the students were to question how I could talk about "Thinking Before Spending" yet stand in front of them wearing shoes with red soles that they guessed cost hundreds of dollars. (I never disclosed their exact price, but the students were online pricing Christian Louboutin shoes.)
Luckily, none of the students have ever asked how many pairs of shoes I owned. I could not compete with the thousands of pairs Imelda Marcos had, but I did own (past tense) hundreds of pairs that I had collected over the years. No, make that decades. I enjoyed the collecting as much as the wearing, and would even buy shoes as souvenirs when I traveled.
My logic, not that I needed any, was that fashion and shoe styles repeat themselves over the years. Plus, classic shoes (from pumps to driving shoes) never seem to go out of style. So, I would carefully store the shoes (and boots) in clear plastic shoe boxes (I lost count of how many cases of shoe boxes I have bought from The Container Store), and every season go down to my storage unit in the basement of my high-rise to shop my "collection" and decide what would "move up" into my closet. Of course, I would add a few new pairs each season. Usually black, because black never goes out of style.
So, what was my dilemma? Which pair to wear? I wish. No, I had to run out and buy a pair of shoes for a date. And, it soon became apparent it was about more than a pair of shoes,
- I had not gone out on a "date" in years, as I do not count dinners out with friends as dates, and I typically wear "dressy" jeans or slacks since we do not dress up. I never wear a dress.
- Although I once had a collection of fabulous dressy high-heel summer sandals, they floated away when Hurricane Harvey flooded the basement of my high-rise. I know all of them did not drown as some were found in the building's garage when the water finally receded, and I can only hope those hundreds of shoes found good homes.
- The pandemic has changed women's attraction to high heels, so when I stopped by Saks to buy a pair of high heeled black sandals, what in the past would have been easy to do, was more like a scavenger hunt as the shoe department was filled with sneakers (!!!) and casual shoes.
I still wonder why I am writing this … other than Red finds the whole situation amusing. But, sometimes, I feel like my life is her entertainment. The other person who suggested I write this post was my date (he did appreciate the effort I put forth to "dust off" a dress and find a pair of date shoes), as he thought my story about the "concept" of wearing a dress on a date and dating post-pandemic was something that a lot of people can relate to right now. Plus, he thought my predicament was, and I quote, "Funny shit!" I guess he, too, finds my life entertaining. Hmmm, maybe I should also dust off our idea for a Red & Black sitcom …
What does Thanksgiving have to do with shoes?! Or, the fact some of Red’s most memorable Thanksgiving celebrations happened when she lived overseas and introduced the holiday to friends, none of whom were American. But this column from 2022 is bittersweet for Black, as shortly after it ran, her good friend John passed away … yet the memories of Thanksgivings spent together – and of dear friends – live on. (But that still doesn’t explain the shoes …)
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | At the risk of asking you a warm and fuzzy question, have you thought about what you’re most thankful for this Thanksgiving? |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | Yes. |
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | I should’ve guessed that you’d take the question literally. Could you expand on that a little, or at least give me a hint? |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | Friends. |
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | I should’ve guessed that too since John’s been in the hospital for the past several weeks and is one of your oldest friends. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | Not sure “oldest” is the kindest way to define it, but he and his wife have been my closest friends for over 35 years. To the point that John calls me his “second wife,” although he’s only been legally married once. |
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | That’s funny, but on my recent fall foliage trip, I realized it was so much more than chasing leaves as I experienced the joy and appreciation of visiting a dear friend and her family. And while phone calls, texting, and even FaceTime are great, it’s just not the same as spending time together. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | I was going to mention that when you first told me you were going to see Sawyer in Nashville and also spend some time at Amy’s in east Tennessee, but figured you already knew that friendships can easily be taken for granted … until something makes you fully appreciate them. |
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | That’s so true. Although I prefer to have a small group of friends, and most of mine I’ve known for decades – either from elementary school, college, or my years living in Hong Kong. Unfortunately, though, none of them now live near me. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | Friends do not require living in the same town, although that is usually how friendships begin. And, while we may not stay in touch as frequently as we want, over time, we see who our true friends are … they are the ones who are always there for us, during good times and bad. And, in my case, are brave enough to point out when they do not agree with me. |
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | Very brave. My friends have it easier, but I count on them to give me an honest perspective no matter what, although I prefer when they agree with me. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | Of course, you do. And, your friends should be thankful you are so easygoing. |
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | Well, at the risk of sounding corny, with Thanksgiving just days away, it’s the perfect time to be truly thankful for our dear friends. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | It reminds me of the photo that Natasha sent us last year when she was celebrating “ Friendsgiving” with her friends in England. |
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | Besides not realizing it was an actual thing and not Natasha combining the words “friends” and “Thanksgiving,” I was expecting photos of her attempt at making sweet potatoes or other traditional Thanksgiving foods , or maybe a bunch of Brits sitting around the table with the lone American. Not a photo of everyone’s shoes in the entry hallway. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | I never thought of Thanksgiving as being “all about the shoes”, but that image sums up the true meaning of the holiday. |
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | Tell the truth; everything’s always all about the shoes for you. But, given this Thanksgiving will be the first without Mom, the image’s a wonderful reminder of the importance of friends who’ve been there for me this year. And I include you as both family and friend. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | Once is enough for me. And, as the saying goes, you cannot choose your family but (like shoes) you can choose your friends. So, pick carefully, and then appreciate them. |
Take a moment and imagine not being able to read this sentence. Now, think about this … if you’re reading this, you’re doing something millions of Americans can’t.
red head assets.rebelmouse.io |
I’ll admit that I never realized how many people can’t read.
It’s something I’ve always taken for
granted. That’s until Black and I met
someone doing something about it – Jackie Aguilera, now the Project Manager for
the Mayor’s Office of Adult
Literacy (Houston). Her focus
wasn’t only on reading literacy but on “literacies” I’d never heard of, such as
financial literacy, health literacy, and digital literacy. But it all starts
with the ability to read. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io |
It
is called functional
literacy. Obviously, if you
are reading this article, you are on the internet. Which has more information than anyone can
possibly absorb (and is why news literacy is so critical). Now,
imagine if you could not read. All that
information … just sitting there.
Available to others, but not to you. |
red head assets.rebelmouse.io |
Books are my great escape. Always have been. So, I can’t
imagine a life without them. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io |
A great escape … in many ways. You may use it to escape from the stresses of
daily life or just as entertainment. But,
books and, more specifically, the ability to read is how people can escape a
life of poverty and limited opportunities.
|
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | Working with Jackie made me see that. As did our work with the criminal justice system, as so many incarcerated people struggle to read. And I know you’re a data geek, but please don’t start quoting me statistics. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | OK, no statistics, but did you know that more people in the US are affected by low literacy (meaning they cannot read at a sixth-grade level) than are diagnosed with cancer or heart disease? |
Over the years, as we’ve learned how many people can’t read (including one in three Houstonians), it’s made us stop and think about how that impacts every aspect of their lives … their families … their communities. And also … our communities and our country.
As former First Lady Barbara Bush said many years ago,
If you help a person to read, then their opportunities in life will be endless.
Because now is the time to decide what direction we want to take our country. RED & BLACK … A Time For Independence is about the spirit of independence. And four years later, we feel it’s very sad (and very scary) that our sentiments about our country’s leaders having the strength, courage, and conviction to be independent thinkers are still relevant. Maybe even more than ever before.