Well, it was a busy weekend, and although I don't wear one of those fitness-tracking watches that count every step I take, I bet quite a lot of miles were covered. Now, before you start thinking I turned into a fitness fanatic and went hiking or did laps at the park, I'm talking about going from store to store. And at times, it felt like a scavenger hunt as my younger daughter tried to complete all her shopping for college so that she could then focus on packing for college.
Not all the miles covered were on foot, but driving from place to place meant dealing with countless parking lots, and my daughter and I felt like bunnies hopping in and out of the car. Which reminded me of when I was growing up (decades ago) and could do most of my shopping by going to a single destination – Sunrise Mall in Massapequa. (What makes me feel old is that when the mall opened in 1972, it was the first two-story shopping center on Long Island!)
Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not doing that "in the good ole' days" thing where I'm finding fault with how shopping is today. But I'd be lying if I didn't say that it made me a little nostalgic for how things once were, especially when I think back to being a teenager. Weekend shopping at the mall was more of a social experience than it was about checking things off a shopping list. (Even then, I was a lover of lists.)
Fast forward to several years ago, and the concept of the shopping mall as a destination still existed. I can remember letting Natasha and Sawyer go shopping at the local First Colony Mall by themselves, giving them their first taste of independence. (Ok, so I "hung out" at a restaurant at the mall with a stack of reading material and had them check-in on a regular basis.)
By then, the shift to online shopping had already begun, and I could see it in the stores – they were less busy and some had gone out of business, and once-busy malls seemed more like ghost towns. Yet, I still preferred brick-and-mortar stores because I wanted to be able to see and touch things before I made a decision. But COVID-19 changed that. Dramatically.
People, like me, who had never really used online shopping, now were dependent on it. Previously, I'd never have considered buying groceries online (I'm not sure why I thought I needed to see and touch staples like toilet paper and laundry detergent) and restaurant delivery, which was unheard of not that long ago, was now the replacement "luxury" for going out to eat.
I can't help but wonder what the future holds for shopping, but was left speechless (not an easy thing to do) when I asked Black her thoughts,
I know you do not want a business explanation of how shopping habits have changed over the years, or details on the demise of the shopping mall. I will tell you that, over the years, I have gone through various stages of shopping – shopping to "prove" I was successful, shopping out of boredom, and shopping as a tourist when traveling. But, I can honestly say that I got the most enjoyment shopping last week … when Sawyer and I went to The Container Store to pick out things for her dorm room.
What does Thanksgiving have to do with shoes?! Or, the fact some of Red’s most memorable Thanksgiving celebrations happened when she lived overseas and introduced the holiday to friends, none of whom were American. But this column from 2022 is bittersweet for Black, as shortly after it ran, her good friend John passed away … yet the memories of Thanksgivings spent together – and of dear friends – live on. (But that still doesn’t explain the shoes …)
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | At the risk of asking you a warm and fuzzy question, have you thought about what you’re most thankful for this Thanksgiving? |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | Yes. |
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | I should’ve guessed that you’d take the question literally. Could you expand on that a little, or at least give me a hint? |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | Friends. |
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | I should’ve guessed that too since John’s been in the hospital for the past several weeks and is one of your oldest friends. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | Not sure “oldest” is the kindest way to define it, but he and his wife have been my closest friends for over 35 years. To the point that John calls me his “second wife,” although he’s only been legally married once. |
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | That’s funny, but on my recent fall foliage trip, I realized it was so much more than chasing leaves as I experienced the joy and appreciation of visiting a dear friend and her family. And while phone calls, texting, and even FaceTime are great, it’s just not the same as spending time together. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | I was going to mention that when you first told me you were going to see Sawyer in Nashville and also spend some time at Amy’s in east Tennessee, but figured you already knew that friendships can easily be taken for granted … until something makes you fully appreciate them. |
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | That’s so true. Although I prefer to have a small group of friends, and most of mine I’ve known for decades – either from elementary school, college, or my years living in Hong Kong. Unfortunately, though, none of them now live near me. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | Friends do not require living in the same town, although that is usually how friendships begin. And, while we may not stay in touch as frequently as we want, over time, we see who our true friends are … they are the ones who are always there for us, during good times and bad. And, in my case, are brave enough to point out when they do not agree with me. |
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | Very brave. My friends have it easier, but I count on them to give me an honest perspective no matter what, although I prefer when they agree with me. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | Of course, you do. And, your friends should be thankful you are so easygoing. |
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | Well, at the risk of sounding corny, with Thanksgiving just days away, it’s the perfect time to be truly thankful for our dear friends. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | It reminds me of the photo that Natasha sent us last year when she was celebrating “ Friendsgiving” with her friends in England. |
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | Besides not realizing it was an actual thing and not Natasha combining the words “friends” and “Thanksgiving,” I was expecting photos of her attempt at making sweet potatoes or other traditional Thanksgiving foods , or maybe a bunch of Brits sitting around the table with the lone American. Not a photo of everyone’s shoes in the entry hallway. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | I never thought of Thanksgiving as being “all about the shoes”, but that image sums up the true meaning of the holiday. |
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | Tell the truth; everything’s always all about the shoes for you. But, given this Thanksgiving will be the first without Mom, the image’s a wonderful reminder of the importance of friends who’ve been there for me this year. And I include you as both family and friend. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | Once is enough for me. And, as the saying goes, you cannot choose your family but (like shoes) you can choose your friends. So, pick carefully, and then appreciate them. |
Take a moment and imagine not being able to read this sentence. Now, think about this … if you’re reading this, you’re doing something millions of Americans can’t.
red head assets.rebelmouse.io |
I’ll admit that I never realized how many people can’t read.
It’s something I’ve always taken for
granted. That’s until Black and I met
someone doing something about it – Jackie Aguilera, now the Project Manager for
the Mayor’s Office of Adult
Literacy (Houston). Her focus
wasn’t only on reading literacy but on “literacies” I’d never heard of, such as
financial literacy, health literacy, and digital literacy. But it all starts
with the ability to read. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io |
It
is called functional
literacy. Obviously, if you
are reading this article, you are on the internet. Which has more information than anyone can
possibly absorb (and is why news literacy is so critical). Now,
imagine if you could not read. All that
information … just sitting there.
Available to others, but not to you. |
red head assets.rebelmouse.io |
Books are my great escape. Always have been. So, I can’t
imagine a life without them. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io |
A great escape … in many ways. You may use it to escape from the stresses of
daily life or just as entertainment. But,
books and, more specifically, the ability to read is how people can escape a
life of poverty and limited opportunities.
|
red head assets.rebelmouse.io | Working with Jackie made me see that. As did our work with the criminal justice system, as so many incarcerated people struggle to read. And I know you’re a data geek, but please don’t start quoting me statistics. |
Black assets.rebelmouse.io | OK, no statistics, but did you know that more people in the US are affected by low literacy (meaning they cannot read at a sixth-grade level) than are diagnosed with cancer or heart disease? |
Over the years, as we’ve learned how many people can’t read (including one in three Houstonians), it’s made us stop and think about how that impacts every aspect of their lives … their families … their communities. And also … our communities and our country.
As former First Lady Barbara Bush said many years ago,
If you help a person to read, then their opportunities in life will be endless.
Because now is the time to decide what direction we want to take our country. RED & BLACK … A Time For Independence is about the spirit of independence. And four years later, we feel it’s very sad (and very scary) that our sentiments about our country’s leaders having the strength, courage, and conviction to be independent thinkers are still relevant. Maybe even more than ever before.