Banter Bites

Think Before … Hugging?!

If you had to live without hugs … would that make you sad or glad?

BANTER BITE BACKSTORY: How can something as simple as a hug elicit such incredibly different reactions; while it’s not surprising that Red thinks about hugs very differently than Black, it’s very surprising which one of them is supported by science.


Red’s a warm and fuzzy mom, so it goes without saying that hugs are an integral part of who she is. And how she raised her daughters. When her girls were young, she gave them lots and lots of hugs until Black, a self-declared non-hugger, pointed out that not everyone needs or wants a hug. Which, to this day, makes Red wonder,

How could I, a hug-lover, have given birth to two daughters, with neither “inheriting” the hugging gene? But having a non-hugger as my sister, I’ve realized that doesn’t mean they don’t love me, just that they don’t want hugs. Even if I think they need them.

The curious thing is, even as a non-hugger, Black will acknowledge that hugs represent affection, concern, love, appreciation, or sometimes just the joy of seeing someone. And although she’s fascinated by the science behind why some people hate hugs, she’s also read studies (she even sent this one to Red) about their health benefits, including how they can relieve stress.

Red was amused how COVID gave Black an excuse to avoid hugging for years, but now, unless you know her, you might think she’s a germophobe or being overly cautious. But it does beg the question, if hugging is good for you, why would Black avoid it,

We all know what we should do but often ignore what is best for us. I have always felt hugging seems selfish in that it is usually the person who needs a hug who insists on hugging. However, sometimes I will compromise and do it for the other person, so I guess you could say my approach to hugs is … it is better to give than to receive. Even on National Hugging Day.
Photo by OnTheRunPhoto for iStock

Until two years ago, Red had never heard of “Dry January” (see our conversation below). But whether or not you’ve taken the challenge, it’s never too late to develop healthy habits. And, FYI, there’s also “Damp January.”



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I keep getting emails about where to go for mocktails. I know alcohol-free cocktails, like Virgin Margaritas, have been around for a while, but I’d never heard that term before. Do you think it has to do with New Year’s resolutions?


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It can if any of your resolutions are to lose weight, save money, sleep better. Or, drink less. Psychologically, January is the month when we “reset”, so a UK-based organization, Alcohol Change UK , started Dry January , where you abstain from drinking alcohol.


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Perfect timing since many people shop, eat, and drink more than usual over the holidays.


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I know you used to drink a glass of Cold Duck on New Year’s Eve, a tradition going back to our childhood, but that hardly counts as drinking. But, I have always wondered why you rarely drink, but never asked.
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You may think the holiday season’s over, but January’s filled with an assortment of holidays, including some very unusual ones. Luckily, unlike the December holidays, these are much less stressful and can be lots of fun. Especially for us, as they celebrate some of our favorite things. (Of the five holidays listed below, can you guess which are Red’s favorites and which are Black’s?)

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It’s January, and everyone’s probably tired of reading about New Year’s resolutions.

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Not me. Since I never make them, I never feel the need to read about them.

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Of course, you don’t. So, what should we write about?

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How about that we celebrate some of our favorite things in January?

So many “National Days” in January are fun (we’ve written about them over the years) and remind us of some of our favorite things. (Can you pick which are Red’s favorite holidays and which are Black’s?) And whether or not you make resolutions, it’s always important to have a sense of humor and enjoy the simpler things in life …

Answer: Red’s favorites are Bagels, Popcorn, and Hugging. Black’s are Clean Desk, Bagels, and Backward.

We’re starting the new year with a new attitude and a new business venture – merchandise! For a limited time only (until the end of January), our Kickstarter campaign will be offering our exclusive, first-edition apparel collection. All include practical and empowering messages based on our real-life stories and experiences.

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I’m so excited about our new products. You might call it “merchandise with meaning,” but I think of it as “fun stuff” that inspires and makes you smile. And I’m thrilled we’re offering a selection of first-edition items, including stickers, even if only for a limited time.


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I love how each piece of merchandise provides humor, wisdom, and practical advice for everyday living but may also inspire better decisions.


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I know we initially planned to have these items available for the holidays, but it seemed nothing went as planned.


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Life rarely does, but I think it worked out for the best because,
The NEW YEAR is a perfect time for a NEW ATTITUDE. And, hopefully, a NEW BUSINESS.

Our Red & Black Kickstarter campaign offers a selection of first-edition merchandise including a sheet of stickers with motivating phrases and eye-catching graphics, but also autographed copies of our bestselling book that can be personalized. Whether you buy something for yourself or for others – we hope it will help get the New Year off to the right start with inspiration and motivation. And humor.

DON’T WAIT! It will be a very short campaign (only 30 days), so there’s no time to waste.

Green rectangular button with image of Red & Black cartoon characters and next to them the text \u201cClick here for our Kickstarter page!\u201d displayed in white.