Words & Banter

If You Behave … You Can Clean The Toilet

Photo by htomas for iStock

What can I tell you? When I was a kid, one of my all-time favorite things to do was … clean the toilet. Yes, you read that correctly. And it wasn’t because I was a germophobe or a clean freak. I just loved being able to sit on the floor, using as much Bon Ami (I’ve no idea why I remember the brand) cleaning powder as I wanted. And the best part? All those bubbles!

It kept me entertained for hours. Not to mention, my mom was thrilled because it kept me “contained” and out of her hair. So much so that if I was very good and behaved myself, she might even give me “special permission” to clean the toilet in my parent’s bathroom. Of course, Black, being five years older and understanding the situation, found it all extremely amusing. Even now, decades later, she still gives me grief about it,


I couldn’t help but think of you when I saw the photo of a robot cleaning a toilet at the recent World Artificial Intelligence Conference. Growing up, I may have been “punished” with a budget, but it is good that you were such an obedient child, as Mom would have hated punishing you by taking away your toilet cleaning privileges.

Of course, Black doesn’t have children, so I’m not sure that she appreciates some of the best childhood memories include simple activities – no technology necessary. (For all the parents out there, how many of you have experienced a Christmas or Chanukah where the kids enjoy the box and/or plastic bubble wrap more than the gift?) There’s even a current TV commercial about a kid fishing in the toilet bowl using a sock as bait. Bottomline: the only “requirement” is a desire to have fun and maybe use some imagination.

And for those of us of a certain age … doesn’t this describe pretty much everything we did as kids growing up? Even Black’s admitted to her love of watermelon seed spitting (although I think she’d enjoy doing it even more now that she lives in a high-dollar high-rise).

Now, don’t get me wrong. Love it or hate it, technology has its place in almost all our lives (and what kid doesn’t want the latest and greatest “gizmo”), but not everything has to be powered by technology,

A computerized toilet cleaner is a marvel of technology, but can it beat the smiles and laughter of a child sloshing a brush around a toilet, especially when you can’t tell if they’re having more fun with the bubbles or the mess that they’re making?
You may think the holiday season’s over, but January’s filled with an assortment of holidays, including some very unusual ones. Luckily, unlike the December holidays, these are much less stressful and can be lots of fun. Especially for us, as they celebrate some of our favorite things. (Of the five holidays listed below, can you guess which are Red’s favorites and which are Black’s?)

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It’s January, and everyone’s probably tired of reading about New Year’s resolutions.

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Not me. Since I never make them, I never feel the need to read about them.

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Of course, you don’t. So, what should we write about?

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How about that we celebrate some of our favorite things in January?

So many “National Days” in January are fun (we’ve written about them over the years) and remind us of some of our favorite things. (Can you pick which are Red’s favorite holidays and which are Black’s?) And whether or not you make resolutions, it’s always important to have a sense of humor and enjoy the simpler things in life …

Answer: Red’s favorites are Bagels, Popcorn, and Hugging. Black’s are Clean Desk, Bagels, and Backward.

Wishing you a year to thrive – Happy 2025!

Photo courtesy of Red’s eldest daughter, Natasha

What does Thanksgiving have to do with shoes?! Or, the fact some of Red’s most memorable Thanksgiving celebrations happened when she lived overseas and introduced the holiday to friends, none of whom were American. But this column from 2022 is bittersweet for Black, as shortly after it ran, her good friend John passed away … yet the memories of Thanksgivings spent together – and of dear friends – live on. (But that still doesn’t explain the shoes …)


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At the risk of asking you a warm and fuzzy question, have you thought about what you’re most thankful for this Thanksgiving?


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Yes.


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I should’ve guessed that you’d take the question literally. Could you expand on that a little, or at least give me a hint?
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