Rather than trying to sweeten things up, they are "real talk." Keep it up Red and Black, thanks for the knowledge, it has been helping me in college, and I even took my folder, keep on spreading the word.
Wouldn’t it be great if life came with instructions? Since it doesn’t, we thought a few good reminders could help … so we created this list.
For those who know us, it won’t come as any surprise that we each approach almost everything differently. But after decades of comparing notes, debating decisions, and occasionally driving each other crazy, we’ve learned a few things about getting through life.
Consider this list our practical, slightly (ok, maybe more than slightly) opinionated guide to approaching life.
Use it, tweak it, or trash it. The choice is yours.
- Start somewhere
You don’t need the perfect plan, you need a first step
- Ask why
It’s Black’s favorite question — and where better decisions begin
- Look at things “another way”
Red and Black almost always do
- Don’t confuse feelings with facts
Both matter, but they aren’t the same thing
- Use what helps — ignore what doesn’t
Advice, like shoes, is not one-size-fits-all
- Talk about it (with someone you trust to listen, be honest, and not judge)
Sometimes saying something out loud helps you see it more clearly
- Make a list
Not just because you love lists (that would be Red), but to help you focus
- Expect things to change
The goal may stay the same even when the route changes
- Ask for help
Others can’t help you if you don’t let them know you need it
- Keep moving forward
A small step forward is still a step in the right direction
- Laugh when you can
It may not change your situation, but it can make it easier to face
- Take control of what you can
Accept that some things are not yours to fix
Consider keeping this list handy … different moments call for different reminders.
Long before we had an ABOUT page, readers met Black through the back flap of our bestselling book, What I Learned About Life When My Husband Got Fired!and Got Fired! But a lot has happened since Neiman Marcus launched our book, including countless Red & Black adventures and detours.
Surprisingly, little about Black has changed.
WHAT WE SAID THEN
Black picked the photo, and our book editor summarized Black in about 80 words:
Black is all business. With an MBA in international Finance, she retired before she was 40 from a successful career in the oil and gas industry. She has been involved with The Make-A-Wish Foundation for over 20 years and has raised over $1 million. But without a day job, her life did not provide enough excitement and challenge, so she began racing cars. Black, the ultimate pragmatic, lives in Houston where she approaches everything with high-speed intensity and determination.
WHAT WE DIDN’T KNOW THEN …
We knew Black was all business. We didn’t know that, instead of becoming the basis of a sitcom, our book would take us into the world of education … and then criminal justice.
We knew racing would always be part of Black’s story. We didn’t know that her experiences racing Porsches and Ferraris would inspire countless car and racing analogies about navigating life.
We knew Make-A-Wish mattered to her. We probably should have known that she would still be involved decades later, and that the amount she has raised would continue to grow (it’s now approaching $2 million).
And we described Black as “the ultimate pragmatic.” Well, no update required.
AND THERE’S A STORY BEHIND THE PHOTO …
We have no shortage of stories, so it shouldn’t be a surprise that this isn’t just an ordinary photo. It was taken by artist and sculptor Fletcher Benton in 2003, when he came to cheer Black on during the Ferrari Challenge races at Infineon Raceway in Sonoma, California.
So, how did an internationally recognized artist end up at one of Black’s races? Although neither of them knew it at the time, years earlier, Fletcher and Black had both been racing at the same Porsche event. But they didn’t actually meet until Black started collecting art and spotted his race car at his studio.
And that may be the real story behind the photo — how so many seemingly separate parts of Black’s life have ended up connecting.
A lot has changed since 2009. Black being Black isn’t one of those things.