Your stomach starts to growl, and you look at your watch, calculating how many more hours you have to endure before you can eat because, simply put, you’re hungry. Or, you can set aside the minor discomfort, appreciating that it’s a small sacrifice to make while you reflect on the past year as Yom Kippur, literally meaning the day of atonement, is a day for reflection, repentance, and forgiveness. And a promise to do better.
When we first ran the post below, it was looking back at a speaking engagement we did in 2014, but this year it’s about doing a repeat performance for Rabbi Scott. The High Holy Days, culminating with Yom Kippur, are about making fundamental changes – or at least adjustments – to how you live your life. And although it’s a spiritual journey, there’s no reason this year’s promise to be a better person can’t start by learning with laughter (and the rumbling of an empty stomach).
| I know that Yom Kippur isn't exactly known as one of the "fun" Jewish holidays, but every year I can't help but laugh at what's easily my number one Yom Kippur memory. |
| That is what makes memories … memorable. And, finding something to laugh at on Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement, which is probably the most important and solemn Jewish holiday, would be memorable. |
| I can't believe you're not even curious what it is!? |
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| You know I love to "connect the dots", and all you had to say was Yom Kippur, fun, and memory. Obviously, it was when Rabbi Scott asked us to speak before his congregation on Yom Kippur. |
| Well, I still find it surreal that we were asked to speak about money on one of the High Holy Days. And that we titled our presentation, "Oy Vey, You Want To Talk About Money?" |
| The day is about reflection, making fundamental changes – or at least adjustments – and trying to become a better person. And, just because it is a spiritual journey, there is no reason you cannot make learning fun. |
| True. I remember the time Rabbi Scott put a piece of aluminum foil in the children's Yom Kippur service program to help them understand that Yom Kippur's a day for reflection. But even you must admit that making a congregation laugh about money on a religious holiday is a bit much. |
| But, memorable. A few years later, I met someone that attended that service, and he said he's never forgotten it. |
| For the content or all the food analogies?! I can remember we started by saying how we just wanted to give everyone some food-for-thought and then saying, "Oops, since Yom Kippur's a day of fasting, maybe bringing up the subject of food wasn't such a good idea." |
| Of course, it did not stop us from doing it, again and again. |
| How else could we explain our unexpected journey into personal finance without mentioning it started at our first speaking engagement … which was at a Jewish Federation breakfast? |
| Or, how our detour into criminal justice started with me meeting with the chaplain at a men's prison? But I knew it was meant to be when she told me they had the only kosher kitchen in the Texas prison system. |
| And each time we looked at each other and then the audience, and we all laughed! With each mention of food, it just got funnier and funnier. But there was no way to avoid it. |
| I know. How could you tell the story about realizing all the money you were mindlessly spending at Jamba Juice without mentioning your almost-daily smoothies? Or, how you went grocery shopping at Whole Foods because it was convenient but not cost-effective. Anyway, until that day, I never realized how so many of our stories have to do with food. |
| I think the highlight was toward the end when I was explaining how I felt overwhelmed trying to tackle personal finance. That at times, things seemed insurmountable, and then you told me … it's like eating an elephant, you can do it, just one bite at a time. And everyone started laughing again. |
| On any other day, I doubt that analogy would make you think of food. But, on Yom Kippur, and especially since we were presenting after at least 15 hours of fasting, everything makes you hungry |
| I guess it's like being so tired that you get slap happy. But I never thought a day of atonement and reflection could end up becoming a day of laughter. |
| On Yom Kippur, we wish people an "easy fast" or a "meaningful fast" … and if a bit of laughter, even if not intended, helps, what is wrong with that? |
| Good point. For that matter, you don't need to be Jewish to take a day, or even just an hour, to stop, to think, and to improve. |
| No fasting required. |
What does Thanksgiving have to do with shoes?! Or, the fact some of Red’s most memorable Thanksgiving celebrations happened when she lived overseas and introduced the holiday to friends, none of whom were American. But this column from 2022 is bittersweet for Black, as shortly after it ran, her good friend John passed away … yet the memories of Thanksgivings spent together – and of dear friends – live on. (But that still doesn’t explain the shoes …)
| At the risk of asking you a warm and fuzzy question, have you thought about what you’re most thankful for this Thanksgiving? |
| Yes. |
| I should’ve guessed that you’d take the question literally. Could you expand on that a little, or at least give me a hint? |
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| Friends. |
| I should’ve guessed that too since John’s been in the hospital for the past several weeks and is one of your oldest friends. |
| Not sure “oldest” is the kindest way to define it, but he and his wife have been my closest friends for over 35 years. To the point that John calls me his “second wife,” although he’s only been legally married once. |
| That’s funny, but on my recent fall foliage trip, I realized it was so much more than chasing leaves as I experienced the joy and appreciation of visiting a dear friend and her family. And while phone calls, texting, and even FaceTime are great, it’s just not the same as spending time together. |
| I was going to mention that when you first told me you were going to see Sawyer in Nashville and also spend some time at Amy’s in east Tennessee, but figured you already knew that friendships can easily be taken for granted … until something makes you fully appreciate them. |
| That’s so true. Although I prefer to have a small group of friends, and most of mine I’ve known for decades – either from elementary school, college, or my years living in Hong Kong. Unfortunately, though, none of them now live near me. |
| Friends do not require living in the same town, although that is usually how friendships begin. And, while we may not stay in touch as frequently as we want, over time, we see who our true friends are … they are the ones who are always there for us, during good times and bad. And, in my case, are brave enough to point out when they do not agree with me. |
| Very brave. My friends have it easier, but I count on them to give me an honest perspective no matter what, although I prefer when they agree with me. |
| Of course, you do. And, your friends should be thankful you are so easygoing. |
| Well, at the risk of sounding corny, with Thanksgiving just days away, it’s the perfect time to be truly thankful for our dear friends. |
| It reminds me of the photo that Natasha sent us last year when she was celebrating “ Friendsgiving” with her friends in England. |
| Besides not realizing it was an actual thing and not Natasha combining the words “friends” and “Thanksgiving,” I was expecting photos of her attempt at making sweet potatoes or other traditional Thanksgiving foods , or maybe a bunch of Brits sitting around the table with the lone American. Not a photo of everyone’s shoes in the entry hallway. |
| I never thought of Thanksgiving as being “all about the shoes”, but that image sums up the true meaning of the holiday. |
| Tell the truth; everything’s always all about the shoes for you. But, given this Thanksgiving will be the first without Mom, the image’s a wonderful reminder of the importance of friends who’ve been there for me this year. And I include you as both family and friend. |
| Once is enough for me. And, as the saying goes, you cannot choose your family but (like shoes) you can choose your friends. So, pick carefully, and then appreciate them. |
Take a moment and imagine not being able to read this sentence. Now, think about this … if you’re reading this, you’re doing something millions of Americans can’t.
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I’ll admit that I never realized how many people can’t read.
It’s something I’ve always taken for
granted. That’s until Black and I met
someone doing something about it – Jackie Aguilera, now the Project Manager for
the Mayor’s Office of Adult
Literacy (Houston). Her focus
wasn’t only on reading literacy but on “literacies” I’d never heard of, such as
financial literacy, health literacy, and digital literacy. But it all starts
with the ability to read. |
|
It
is called functional
literacy. Obviously, if you
are reading this article, you are on the internet. Which has more information than anyone can
possibly absorb (and is why news literacy is so critical). Now,
imagine if you could not read. All that
information … just sitting there.
Available to others, but not to you. |
|
Books are my great escape. Always have been. So, I can’t
imagine a life without them. |
|
A great escape … in many ways. You may use it to escape from the stresses of
daily life or just as entertainment. But,
books and, more specifically, the ability to read is how people can escape a
life of poverty and limited opportunities.
|
| Working with Jackie made me see that. As did our work with the criminal justice system, as so many incarcerated people struggle to read. And I know you’re a data geek, but please don’t start quoting me statistics. |
| OK, no statistics, but did you know that more people in the US are affected by low literacy (meaning they cannot read at a sixth-grade level) than are diagnosed with cancer or heart disease? |
Over the years, as we’ve learned how many people can’t read (including one in three Houstonians), it’s made us stop and think about how that impacts every aspect of their lives … their families … their communities. And also … our communities and our country.
As former First Lady Barbara Bush said many years ago,
If you help a person to read, then their opportunities in life will be endless.